Sunday 2 July 2017

Sunday Dilemma


Ain't life's choices difficult.  I could add a few more places to the list. Tipton is too obvious. Although the place is the arse hole of the Western world I do have a certain grudging love for the place (no shit, Flaxen?). I grew up there and like all the best Tiptonites I fucked off elsewhere as soon as I could afford good shoes.   

The Middle East could do with a bit of a stir up and North Korea would benefit from a little thermal attention. General MacArthur's dream from the first Korean war would be fulfilled. And as for Japan- the nasty slant-eyed nips got off light in 1945. A few more would help to allay my long gone uncles Charlies' fervent desire. He, being a veteran of the Burma campaign, an all. Saw things that destroy a man's humanity. Also, it might cut down on the flow of Japanese snipers parachuting into the West Midlands.

Anyway, conforming to the list in the above picture, which I can't fault, by the way, my additions would make a tally of 10 bombs. I'm making an assumption that the yield of a single bomb would be 100 Megatons. Five of the nuclear buggers would be dedicated to Japan. That'll teach them for believing that Hirohito was a god. And, also, Shintoism is a load of bollocks.

Oh, fuck it make it a round  11 bombs- Tipton is back on the list.

Now, where did I leave my medication.........


There goes the neighbourhood

 

7 comments:

  1. Whilst I share your views on Tippen (And Gornal, ower kid) I must point out that as I live around 12 or 13 miles (as the crow flies) from said Jewel in The Crown of the Black Country, should you unleash armageddon upon Tippen, I shall be somewhat peeved - at least for the fraction of a millisecond before I become radioactive ash.

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  2. For you Ted, I could decrease the yield to around 100kt with ground zero above the library. In thus scenario you should just notice a faint glow on the horizon. Most Tipton residents wont notice the devastation as there will be very little structural change. The excess radiation will cause a few extra mutations it is true, hopefully it will cause mass sterility.

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  3. I'll let you know when to give you a chance to put your sunglasses on. How far are you from Kate's Hill in Dudley? I used to live there too. Thinking about adding it to the list.

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    1. I'm in Codsall, about 4-5 miles WNW of Wolverhampton. Some 12 miles from Kates Hill - according to Google Maps.

      I wouldn't worry about the "few extra mutations" though, as who would notice?

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    2. The only good thing about Dudley, apart from Teddy Grey's toffee, the ale, was JBs.

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    3. Haven't been to JBs in around 40+ years; agree about the Teddy Gran's, and a good pint of Hanson's was bostin'.

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