Sunday, 20 September 2015

Inventions akimbo

The De-Lintinator in action

At Flaxen Saxon Enterprises we are constantly and diligently searching for new inventions to make your life easier. Our prestigious Institute has been responsible for such innovative inventions as the 'Scrotometer' an important scientific instrument designed to measure random scrotal gyrations after a thermal insult.

For those interested in gleaning the detritus which accumulates over time within the dark recess of your navel, you need the 'Navel De-Lintanator'. Not available in stores. Once acquired, you need to place your 'fluff' in a easy to maintain container. Look no more! With the our patented receptacle, 'The Fluffinator', you can maintain your sebaceous mat of dead cells interwoven with sundry secretions in a pristine state. Lovingly stored until you are ready to fashion your waste into a delightful ferret.

Except taste

Have you ever wondered how big your arse it? Well wonder no more! Our dedicated design team at Flaxen Saxon Enterprises have put together a wondrous device which measures the relative mass of your posterior. We call it the, 'Arse, Big Fat Arse anator'



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