Tuesday, 15 September 2020

I'm Not Dead, Just Rusting

Don't worry folks, the rumours of my demise are misleading. It has been noted by all my eight followers that I have not submitted an erudite post since the 28th of August. I hear screams of woe and lamentations/lamingtons. I have received emails imploring the Flaxen-haired one to return to the blogosphere with alacrity. It has been suggested that my prolonged absence is a sign of worldwide impending doom. I say: "Take heart, the dearth of posts will not last forever, unlike the Crony virus". The lack of posting is not a sign of the second coming or of the Raptor. Let it be known before panic sets in and rioting, looting, and burning sweeps across the United States: I am alive and well although my usually luscious locks are a little 'lifeless', currently- note to self- must use more conditioner.

I have been a tad busy preparing a lecture for this Thursday. Once this venture is completed I will be able to give my undivided and rapt attention to my prestigious/prodigious organ of dissemination.

Take heed O mortals and despaireth not. A new post is but a thrice away. I beseech patience, all will be fulfilled in the fullness of time. Crinkly Arse Bucket.



  1. I thought that lamingtons were purely an Aussie indulgence.
    Those poor antipodeans seem to have a very limited range of pattiserie.
    When you think that they are descendants of people from countries rich in sweet and savoury baked treats.
    They other thing that amazed me in Aus was how foul the only rum was. No wonder they always mask it with cola.
    And being a major producer of cane sugar, they do not have demarrera, muscovado and all other sugar types.
    There must be a reason.

  2. Your usually erudite and amusing posts have been missed. I thought perhaps the Benny Hill one had overwhelmed you, or you were listening to his "girl chase music" on a never-ending loop.
    Some comic from Manchester (the city) joked about Aussie linen recently - how we laughed!

  3. I too admit to having been absent from the blogosphere mainly due to serious bouts of depression and anxiety caused in no little part by the arse next door knocking seven shades of shite put of his house whilst buggering off to France for the duration of the work.

    Perhaps I should take your advice and burn the bastard's house down ???

    I trust that Lady Saxon's serious medical incursions went well. Please relay unto her our fondest warm wishes.

    I shall mail you when I can raise the effort. It's not easy - so don't take it personally. Arse...! Great big chinky flu arse...!

    1. Hello Mr D, your sage musings have been missed. Mrs S has had the ops, although one of the wounds became infected and she had to return to hosy. However, she is doing fine now. Your neighbour sounds like a right cunt. I will send you mail.