|Mr Vowel prior to medication|
Shock announcement from the Tipton municipal city council, today! The incumbent Mayor, Mr Enoch Vowel, at an impromptu mass meeting, attended by local dignities and press declaimed thusly: "It is time to declare my Divinity. You are privileged at this momentous time in history to be part of a glorious and expensive beginning".
When asked by one of his acolytes, Miss Fanny Akimbo, when had he first realised that he had metamorphosed into a god, he countered in a beatific manner and all those present did attest to the ethereal glow which attended his sanctified countenance. "I became aware of my transformation after consuming two bottles of gin and a magnum of champagne. Afterward, I commenced the transmogrification process which culminated in full divinity during an interlude of supine/sublime stupefaction. My Divine presence will not be cheap to maintain and, by decree, a tithe of 10% will be enacted upon all citizens of Tipton town, forthwith. Furthermore, I shall surround myself with nubile female nymphets who will attend to my remorseless spiritual and carnal appetites".
|Fanny attending to the Divine|
Later that day Mr Vowel was incarcerated in the Tipton 'Bide a Wee Home' for deluded and bewildered politicians. The five hundred bed facility is currently full.
Mrs Dildo Mugumbo, a lifetime Tipton resident, when pressed against a wall, gasped: "It comes as no surprise as I've always thought Mr Vowel to be a bit of a cult".
|Mrs Mugumbo gasping against the wall|