I am absolutely certain that Madeline Mccann was abducted by aliens. All the evidence points to this. Whether or not they were paedophiles is yet another unresolved question. I have been anally probed by aliens on numerous occasions and care for it not at all. 'Please Mr Alien peel me a banana, daylight come and I wanna go home.' What I really wanted to say is: stop shoving stuff up my botty (arse, big fat arse) you Alien deviants.' Where is my tin foil hat when I need it.