Thursday 7 June 2018

Resignation


And so it has come to pass: Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away, now I need a place to hide away, or at least somewhere to take my medication.

I've handed in my resignation. On the 30th June, I become a man of infinite leisure. A country Lord living a simple life, enjoying simple pleasures. Anyway, I'm going to share with the world my letter of resignation. 

"As one door closes, another falls off its hinges and clouts you on the noggin"   


1st June 2018
Dear Prof. Mugumbo,
I am respectively tendering my resignation as a Senior Scientist positioned in the Institute of Difficult Stuff, Tipton. I understand I’m obliged to render 4 working weeks, as notice. Consequently, the commencement of my notice transpires from Friday the 1st June 2108, to encompass all hitherto days culminating in the demise of service on 29th June 2018. 
I would like it to be known that I’ve enjoyed service under your watch. You have proved to be a most professional of managers and a man worthy of esteem and respect. It is with great sadness that I relinquish employment, but I’m forced to do so under circumstances not completely within my control, but governed by fates, capricious and undiscerning. Indeed, as mortal men, we are just floating jetsam in the great ‘sea’ of change. Tossed and rendered senseless by forces beyond our control- feeble humans, that we are.
As you are no doubt aware, my beloved wife, Mrs. Saxon, has been beleaguered by a thousand furies and assailed by the wrath of rheumatoid arthritis. Tis a malady which waxes and wanes, but to date shows no abate. Consequently, my hand has been forced and I feel obliged to follow. In truth, the laboratory is best served by the recruitment of new, young and fresh-faced staff (nay, vibrant), unsullied by the burden of life’s tribulations. This is a gift I bestow upon the laboratory. Sir, do not squander but apply my selfless beneficence to the greater good. 
Yours Sincerely and with aplomb,
Flaxen Saxon 

6 comments:

  1. You could have just said "Fuck it! I quit..."?

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    1. Mr D, now that would be darn right rude, I'm more subtle than that. Anyway, all the good stuff has been saved for my leaving speech. Tis going to be hoot. I'll blog the transcript later.....

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  2. Retirement:- when you've given so much to your employers, you no longer have anything left which they can use.

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    1. Its funny when you know its time to go. Everything has come together to suggest retirement. But its a little scary and a great change. That said, I'm sure I'll keep busy as I've a lot of hobbies and interests.

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  3. Good luck with retirement. I retired just over 20 years ago and would not have it any other way. For the first time in your life you can do what you like ,when you like, with no responsibility to anyone else (excepting close family) As any retired person will tell you, the real difficulty in retirement is finding the time to fit everything in.

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  4. I suppose I'm looking forward to the change, but still, retirement is such a leap in the dark.

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