A Thesis by any other Name.

                                                    Handsome beast isn't he?   

O Lordy, Lordy, Lardy! Where do I begin? I suspect that most have heard about the delightful, Kent Hovind. He is an American fundamentalist preacher and convicted felon. He is decidedly old school and believes that the Earth is 6,000 years old; Adam and Eve once lived upon the earth, in paradise; dinosaurs cohabitated with humans and Noah built an Ark. As to be expected he is rabidly ant-evolution. Need I say any more? I'm sure my readership has a clear idea of the man and his beliefs.

In 1990 he submitted a Doctoral dissertation and was awarded a PhD from 'Patriot Bible University', an unaccredited Bible college. The college is considered a 'Diploma Mill' and the only qualification required is a hefty 'enrolment fee'. Academic credentials and acadaemic rigour do not appear to be part of the curriculum. Generally, doctoral dissertations are available to all, but in this instance, Mr Hovind's copy (note I refrain from calling doctor) got eaten by a pack of rabid evangelical hounds (Canus nonexistancus). Furthermore, the college does not make submitted dissertations available to the academic community. Luckily, for the furtherance of mankind's intellectual development, in 2009, WikiLeaks obtained a copy for distribution to an eagerly awaiting community of savants. Kent's PhD is but one of four obtained by this man-genius. Undoubtedly, we live in wondrous times.

I have managed to secure a copy for my own edification and here is what I found........... Firstly, I am required to provide a little context. A doctoral thesis, in order to satisfy the examiners, is required to represent new areas of scholarship that add to the existing corpus of knowledge. Usually, the quality and relevance of the work are judged by three to five acaedemic experts in the field. In Mr Hovind's case, his work was reviewed by one individual, Dr Wayne Knight.

 He starts the work off by saying: Hello, my name is Kent Hovind. The thesis comprises 13 chapters with grandiose titles, such as, 'The Religion of  Evolution'. Strangely, there is no title to his work or even page numbers. It appears that the 'thesis' was printed off a dot matrix printer, the epitome of technology of the time.  

In the introduction we read: I am, without apology, a Bible-believing Christian. I have been saved for twenty-two years by the blood of Jesus Christ, God’s Son. I believe that God’s Word is infallible and flawless in every detail. If the Bible says that something was created a certain way, then that is just the way It happened. We further note: His historical synopsis of evolution begins with Satan, the great evolutionary theorist. In this passage, we learn that it was the wicked snake of Satan who introduced Adam and Eve to evolutionary theory. I never knew that and I must thank Kent for repairing an abundant and manifest gap in my knowledge. I must have missed that chapter when perusing a book on the 'Theory of Evolution'.  What a silly sod, am I.    

This sets the tone for the so-called thesis. This is not a critical, well-researched, and analysed document. From the start, we see that Hovind has no intention of following the evidence, where ever it may take him. Everything will be subject and subsumed to scripture. There is no reasoning process here just blind obedience to biblical teaching. This is not a promising start. He further notes that he is not producing any original work. This is an odd admission for someone who is supposedly presenting a doctoral thesis. The very essence of a thesis, at this level, should be the introduction of original knowledge.

This is not a well-written piece of 'scholarship'. Tis peppered throughout with grammatical and spelling errors. There are also many errors of fact. He is prone to tangents and throughout the work, there are unsubstantiated claims against evolution. He rants and rails and has a tendency toward incoherence. We are reminded that we are not dealing with a piece of serious scholarship, more a farcical parody. Clearly, we are not dealing with an intelligent man. 

It is not possible to explain all that is wrong with Mr Hovind's work. I entreat my readers to read this masterpiece themselves. Anyone willing to read this drivel should contact me and I will forward the 'thesis' in PDF form.

I'll finish with the following quote. This is typical and summarises the timbre of the narrative. Everything is encapsulated in this short extract of drivel. This is all you really need to know about this deluded and very silly man: Hitler was an evolutionist and it was the crazy doctrine of evolution that was responsible for World War.  His historical synopsis of evolution begins with Satan, who else, the great evolutionary theorist and he alleges that the snake, masquerading as Satan, introduced Adam and Eve to evolutionary theory. Thus, evolution, ultimately lead to the 'Downfall of all humankind'.

If nothing else Mr Hovind's effort is for a good old belly laugh. I suggest my readers obtain a beer, sit in a comfy chair then wade through this work of fiction. Good luck.